Archive for the ‘Quotes’ Category


perfect alibi

November 10, 2008

“there is no way I could have been there. I was at the rope store.”

– Jesse Joyce

re: man in question regarding an 18 year old girl’s hanging.


if you can hear this, we’re not talking about you

September 23, 2008

my friend went to a petting zoo in Idaho and they just pet potatoes like retarded people.

-Keith Malley


a craving for Jesus

April 12, 2008

i think it’s a cross between a regular cone and a sugar cone.

i think Jesus is a sugar cone made with Equal.

-Keith Malley


are you there God?

April 10, 2008

do you mutter your needs to an invisible giant?


Mark Twain

March 26, 2008

loyalty to your country always. loyalty to your government when it deserves it.