Date Watch 08

September 23, 2008

i got a call from an old friend (Andy) on Saturday night. we were the bestest of buds, watching movies together via telephone during late night airings of The Three Musketeers and Selena, pining over American Idol contestants during its first season, having lofty dreams of opening our own bowling alley with regular “salsa nights.” the dip, not dance.

anyway, i went to college in Pennsylvania and he stayed in Illinois. Freshman year we talked weekly on the phone, but like most long distance relationships, this one fizzled. i hadn’t really heard from him besides the occasional facebook wall post (god where would we be without the ‘book?) and it had been about 2 solid years sans contact. it was never intentional, but we just grow apart as people.

He called, we talked for an hour, chatting about former friends (weird to say former, but it’s so true), high school, finding love, happiness, etc. it’s so nice to know that there are people in your life, even if they’re not always present. He even helped me set a goal for my summer! Find someone stupid enough to agree to attend a wedding of someone they don’t know in the middle of Iowa.

stop laughing, please. said wedding is supposedly going to have an open bar, according to the groom. he knows that an open bar isn’t something to joke about.

Andy and i were discussing how he feels like a failure sans lady friend, and i just kind of laughed, but in a weird way agreed. now i don’t feel as if i’m really failing in the dramatic sense, but statistically speaking, we’re kinda fucked. i told him that it’s just not a life priority for me right now, because let’s face it i’d rather get a job than something that wants monster truck season tickets (although that’s oddly attractive in a Greg House kind of way).

back to the wedding date. it’s my turn to introduce the group to someone and have them sit there awkwardly playing with the butter dish and knife while the rest of us argue over who has to team up and finish the keg. since i was on keg duty last go-round, i’ll have plenty of free time to spike drinks and eat cake. Posse weddings are fun for everyone involved. plus Iowa is great. corn fields, world’s largest truck stop. it’s win-win.

at publishing time i’m the last single member of the posse, a group in which i retain junior status, so it’s important that i start making bad life decisions as soon as possible, and show them off to my friends. so who’s with me?!? i cannot guarantee that driving across the country to wind up in Des Moines would be remotely fun, but the Iowa Cubs play there, and i bet there are huge balls of yarn along the way. and car karaoke is a specialty of mine so bring your earplugs. forward this to all of your single friends. June is coming in 9 months.

after quickly scanning the above composition, i feel a slight need to clarify things. i will most likely find this date on the road en route to said event. probably at the world’s largest truck stop, a mere 3 hours before you reach Des Moines. i’ll be marking plus one on my invitation regardless because i love a challenge.

and in a completely unrelated note, i just want everyone who reads this to know that i took the photograph that serves as the header to this rarely visted page. it’s a portion of Tesnov, the legal graffiti site in Prague. i love that it glows. it was so cloudy that day too. also, new sports night mockery coming soon, i need a Dan Rydell fix and i’ve got plenty of work to avoid.


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